News Update!

Well I've seen that people seem to like things about Celebrities. Who knew? Well I guess I'll add some things about them, if I like them. As for random emotional things. There will probably be more of that. And Music reviews, I Still have to get to that. Anyway, I've been gone for a while... If anyone had noticed... O.O I'll be posting some more things soon. Even though I know I have lots of Chemistry work to get to. If anyone has any suggestions feel free to make them in a comment here. Thank you for your time! ♥

Out of the Cloest and into the World

I'm addressing a a few things here. Well the obvious one is what the title implies. For all my social networking cites I'm putting my orientation as 'gay' as most put it. That is because I prefer girls to boys. normally I would have put that I'm bi because I am but there are way to may girls that say they're bi when they aren't they just say they are for attention. I on the other hand don't want male attention, like they're trying to get. Apparently liking girls is attractive... I don't see why honestly. I mean I do like gay guys but only because they are sweet and aren't flirting with me. They're just being nice. Not to mention they're much cleaner and less perverted most of the time. Not to mention I don't want to date a Bi girl. The ones I've met are the "popular" girls in my school and they are anything but nice. I'm not trying to offend all bi girls because I am one and I know there are more that are more like me then the ones I know. I would love to meet you if you are... ♥Thank you for reading ♥

Gender Issues

No this entry is not insulting bisexual or homosexual people. It is about my own gender issues. Truthfully I'm a supporter of gay rights and its just plan stupid that they don't have the rights straight people do. I mean there is no difference! They just love their own kind there is NOTHING wrong with that and it doesn't affect straight people in anyway so you homophobes need to just get over it. I don't care if you are the one person who actually reads my blog! Get over it! They aren't hurting anybody. It just stupid that people condemn what they don't understand. ANYWAY... On to the reason for the title. I have gender issues of my own. You see I like both girls and guys, simply because I just like them as people not for any hormonal reasoning. Of course I do find them both attractive, more so girls than guys but still. I kind of still like guys but I like girls more. I want to be able to be sweet and flirty with girls without getting dirty looks. I don't mean just to people I know go that way. Maybe it's just my confidence level. :/ I just want to change. In appearance. I don't know what to do. I say gender confused because my first thought after I decided to change how I look was to look like a boy... I'm just so confused. Well If you are reading this and have any advice I would love to hear it. Thank you lovely people for reading this, I love you. I'll be sure to make another entry explaining how things went.

Eyes Closed

I close my eyes for what seems like a moment but when I wake up I find I've been out for days. I lost my best friends. All my feelings are gone... I have to cut it off. Leave, like I always do. They hate me. They all do and I can't blame them I hate me too. I always leave. It's not that I have to it is just that I automatically detach myself. I feel like I don't have control anymore. I feel like my mind pushes people away with out my okay, with out me even knowing. By the time I realize it all it's to late and there is nothing left. I just wait, for someone who can change that, for someone who can fix me. I feel like I really am broken, my mind is broken. From years of abandonment. They come and leave as suddenly as they came. I got hurt so many times from them that I push away before anyone else can hurt me. I don't try to. I want to love forever I want to stay close but I can't there is something in me that won't let me. I hate it and it hurts the ones I love... I just wish I could control what ever is doing this to me... I wish I could control myself.